Monday, March 12, 2012

If I Ruled The World

Hi, sorry, it's been almost a month since I blogged.  Life has just been busy and (don't tell the blog) but usually when it's crazy like that blogging is the first thing to go.

Anyways, on to more important things, things like if I ruled the world.  Last night was windy (no, don't stop reading now, I swear I do have a point).  Like really windy.  Like so windy I didn't sleep much.  Which means my brain had a lot of time to think.  Well, to think about stupid things that is.  And I decided that if I ruled the world I would have universal rules (other than the usual world peace, no poverty, etc).  so here they are:

  1. All debit cards MUST have to be swipped the same way (I'd prefer swipe facing inside but it would not be a dictatorship so we could vote).  That way you don't look like a dummy when you are paying for something and you are trying to swipe your card every direction!
  2. All Chinese food restaurants MUST have the same numbers on their menu.  For example: all Ginger Beef is #1, all Salt and Pepper Squid is #2, etc.  That way you never have to remember a different numbers when you try a new restaurant.  This would also apply to Pho.
  3. All public doors can only have handles if you need to pull it to open.  If it's a push to open door then it cannot have a handle.  This is so you don't look like a dummy when you are trying to enter a building by pulling on the handle desperately when it's a push to open kinda door!  

Would you vote for me?  What would your rules be?


Catherine Dabels said...

Chips cards have done away with all the swiping. Would your world not have chip cards?

I have only one rule.

Don't be stupid. No one is allowed to be stupid.


Other than the obvious, world peace, no poverty etc....of course.

Impulsive Addict said...

I love and agree with all 3. I hope you rule the world soon. =)

Credit card machines make me angry! I always end up feeling stupid!

Mama said...

Haha! I like the one about the doors. Here are 3 for me:

1. Cars would not turn or change lanes unless your turn signal is on. If you tried to change lanes or turn without first turning on your blinker, a voice would come out of your dash reminding you not to drive like a dumbass. (Okay, so this probably wouldn't be safe in an emergency but it's not real anyway)

2. 800 numbers, etc. would give you the option to use buttons or voice response rather than just saying you can use either. It really pisses me off when I call AT&T and while I'm waiting to hear my option Lyla shouts "bad kitties!" in the background and I hear "you said U-verse support. Did I get that right?" from the other end of the phone. Just let me key in the my responses if I want!

3. The whole world would be on the metric system. Eff you fractions!!

The Tompkins Family said...

I like it! Welcome back!

Joy said...

A month?! Hahahahaa! You are doing awesome compared to my 1 year since I've blogged :))

Anonymous said...

The malls would have "driving" lanes so stooooopid people who walk too slow would have their own lane and those who cut people off would stop doing it!

Danifred said...

I love the door rule. I would also like to demand the revolving and automatic doors always work so you don't stand there looking stupid while it doesn't do anything.